Today's Martyrs

Open Doors USA is a ministry that supports and advocates for martyred Christians around the world.  Their website reports that, globally, an average of eight Christians are killed because of their faith in Jesus Christ every day.  The ministry indicates that the exact number of martyrs may be higher, due to the difficulty of obtaining information about what is happening in North Korea.

The following information is published on Open Doors USA’s website:

In just the last year*, there have been:

Over 340 million Christians living in places where they experience high levels of persecution and discrimination

4,761 Christians killed for their faith

4,488 churches and other Christian buildings attacked

4,277 believers detained without trial, arrested, sentenced or imprisoned

https://www.opendoorsusa.org/christian-persecution/

 The ministry says that the 10 most dangerous countries for Christians (in rank order) are:

 

1.    North Korea

2.    Afghanistan

3.    Somalia

4.    Libya

5.    Pakistan

6.    Eritrea

7.    Sudan

8.    Yemen

9.    Iran

10. India

                 (To this list I would add the Peoples Republic of China.)

To be honest, the information provided here about U.S. aid to the named countries is the result of a very quick search on usa.gov, and I am not guaranteeing its exact accuracy.  Please regard them as “ballpark” figures.  That said, after you read this you may find yourselves asking … WHY?

The latest complete data available was for, 2019.  In that year, the U.S. taxpayers provided the named countries with military, economic, humanitarian, etc. aid in the following approximate amounts:

 

1.    North Korea …………       $3.4 million

2.    Afghanistan ………….      $4.9 billion

3.    Somalia ………………      $665 million

4.    Libya ………………….      $91 million

5.    Pakistan ……………...      $684 million

6.    Eritrea ………………...      $1.4 million

7.    Sudan (South) ….........      $674 million

8.    Yemen ………………...     $810 million

9.    Iran …………………….     $1.4 million

10. India ……………………    $97 million

 

(And my personal addition)

 

Communist China …          $29 million

https://explorer.usaid.gov/

To be fair, many of these countries are failed, or failing, states with grave humanitarian problems.  I ask you, however, why we are giving any kind of aid to Communist China and North Korea?  True, we are to love our enemies, but China has more money than they can spend.  North Korea is a fire that may burn down world peace, so why pour gasoline on it?

Under President Xi Jinping, the Chinese churches that are not state sponsored are being closed down, and pastors are being arrested and incarcerated.  Surveillance cameras are tracking Christians, and facial recognition software is being used to provide the police with records to identify them.  The Chinese concentration camps hold a number religious minorities … not just Moslems. They also hold growing numbers of political prisoners.  These persons are often made to do forced labor.

In North Korea, persons who are caught with a Bible, or are even suspected of being Christians are put in concentration camps where they are starved, beaten, and denied medical care.  If that doesn’t kill them, they are often executed.  No one knows how many have lost their lives.

The kind of persecution varies in the other countries. Christianity is illegal in some Islamic states.  At best, Christians there are relegated to second-class citizenship, discriminated against, and/or forced to pay an extra tax.  The families of Christians shun them and beat them.  Honor killings of Christians by their families are not unknown.  The community often turns on them.  Their neighbors beat them, kill them, and burn down their houses.  Radical Hindu nationalists are doing the same thing in India, while the Indian government looks the other way.

Once there were widespread communities of Christians and Jews scattered throughout the Middle East.  Since the beginning of the Twentieth Century, the Jews have either been killed or driven into Israel.  The Christians have been killed or scattered.  More recently, ISIS and other groups have destroyed communities that had been Christian for over a thousand years.

I could go on and on.  What I am asking is why my tax dollars are being given to countries where the leadership has sworn to destroy the United States and Israel?  Why are we being asked to support countries where Christians (and other minorities) are persecuted? What assurance do we have that our humanitarian aid is being used for humanitarian purposes?  How much of it is going into the leaders’ pockets or to fund terrorism?

According to Open Doors USA, the 11 worst persecutors of Christians are:

1.    ISIS

2.    Al-Qaeda 

3.    Kim Jong-un

4.    Hindu Nationalists The predominant Hindu nationalist association is referred to as the RSS (Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh).

5.    Al-Shabaab

6.    Boko Haram

7.    Militant Fulani Herdsmen

8.    Radical Islam

9.    Drug Cartels

10. Chinese Communist Party

11. Satan (who is behind it all)

More information about the countries and persecutors is provided by the ministry on the website.

https://www.opendoorsusa.org/christian-persecution/stories/every-day-8-christians-killed-for-their-decision-to-follow-jesus/

The Voice of the Martyrs website has a map that asks for prayer for persecuted Christians worldwide.  The countries where Christians are being persecuted most severely are shaded.  In addition to being a prayer guide, the map is interactive.  If you click on a country, you will get a brief description of the country and the kind of persecution that is taking place.

https://www.persecution.com/globalprayerguide/

Conclusion:

The United States provides economic and military aid to a great many countries.  There is always more than one reason that individuals, groups, communities, nations, and world organizations do things. American “foreign aid,” may be provided to help needy people, to equip countries to defend themselves, to alleviate humanitarian crises, in the hope of creating good will, and for other reasons too numerous to list here.  The aid the United States gives to other countries is not always well placed; nor does it always achieve its intended goals.

I urge our government to do a zero based, cost/benefit analysis of the foreign economic and military aid we are providing.  I ask that the human rights record of recipient countries be given the strongest consideration, during that examination.

I ask that you please pray for our persecuted sisters and brothers in Christ at home and abroad.  Please write your elected representatives with your concerns.

SPECIAL NOTE: Like all nation states, the United States is a human creation.  Therefore, like every other country, we have our faults.  The difference is that we have our disagreements in public, for all to see.  That is not a weakness, it is a free society in action.  It does, however, leave us open to cheep shots from those who would rather criticize America than deal with their own human rights problems. (Chinese delegation at Anchorage, Alaska)

A study of American History shows a record of continuous improvement; sometimes at great cost.  When we have real problems, we fix them … eventually.  We do not hide anything, even when things are exploited for political gain by unscrupulous politicians, radicals, and a ratings-hungry press.  That is what makes us different from the countries listed above.

 

 

The Bible Explains Itself

If we seek it out, God’s Word explains itself to us as we read it.  The Parable of the Sower is an obvious example.  At other times, we need to look a lot harder, but it is there.

On that day Jesus had gone out of the house and was sitting by the sea.  And large crowds gathered to Him, so He got into a boat and sat down, and the whole crowd was standing on the beach.

And He told them many things in parables, saying, “Behold, the Sower went out to sow;  and as he sowed, some seeds fell beside the road, and the birds came and ate them up.  Others fell on the rocky places, where they did not have much soil; and they sprang up immediately, because they had no depth of soil.  But after the sun rose, they were scorched; and because they had no root, they withered away.  Others fell among the thorns, and the thorns came up and choked them out.  But others fell on the good soil and yielded a crop, some a hundred, some sixty, and some thirty times as much.  The one who has ears,  let him hear.”  (Matthew 13:1-9 NASB) *

Later, Jesus explained the parable to His disciples:

“Listen then to the parable of the Sower.  When anyone hears the word of the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what has been sown in his heart. This is the one sown with seed beside the road.  The one sown with seed on the rocky places, this is the one who hears the word and immediately receives it with joy;  yet he has no firm root in himself, but is only temporary, and when affliction or persecution occurs because of the word, immediately he falls away.  And the one sown with seed among the thorns, this is the one who hears the word, and the anxiety of the world and the deceitfulness of wealth choke the word, and it becomes unfruitful.  But the one sown with seed on the good soil, this is the one who hears the word and understands it, who indeed bears fruit and produces, some a hundred, some sixty, and some thirty times as much.” (Matthew 13:18-23 NASB) *

In the power of the Holy Spirit, let’s try to reach as many people as we can with the Gospel of Jesus Christ, which is the good news that Jesus has saved us all from a life of sin and death.

*  https://biblehub.com/nasb_/matthew/13.htm

 

Should Christian Ministries be Tax-exempt?

Many Christians may disagree with this post.   Nevertheless, I have felt for some time that something needs to be said.  So, here goes.

Churches and other religious organizations may apply for tax-exempt status under Title 26, Section 501(c)(3) of the Internal Revenue Code.  Just because you can do something does not mean you should.  There is more to it than just the immediate financial benefit to charitable organizations and contributors.  As always, we will seek out the whole wisdom of God on the matter from the Bible, and we will discuss the practical application of God’s Word to the problem.

The easy way would be to cite a proof text to make a point, and then call it good.  However, the Word often complex.  If I were to include everything in the Bible that might be applied to whether churches ought to obtain tax-exempt status, the result would be a book, not a blog post.  Therefore, some representative texts are provided.

I urge you to obtain a good Bible concordance, and to start looking up key words and the verses in the Bible in which they appear.  When the meaning of a text is unclear, you will find a great collection of commentaries at https://biblehub.com/  If you are blessed with a good Pastor, please ask him or her.  However, do not be lazy.  Do your own research.

The position of believers in the world is central to whether churches should become tax- exempt.  Are we citizens of the Kingdom of Christ, or are we citizens of the nation state in which we live?  If the church will have more money to spread the gospel through tax-exemption, shouldn’t we do it?  What about the way the government spends our taxes?  Do we want the money God’s people give to the church to pay for government programs and policies that are unbiblical?  As citizens in a democratic republic, do we bear a corporate responsibility for what our elected government does?

Christians are to be, ‘in the world but not of it.’  The Bible says we are called to be separate, (2Corinthians 6:17), and that loving the things of world is enmity to God. (James 4:4) Chapters 17 and 18 of Revelation describe a world economic, religious, and political system that is controlled by the Antichrist, during the Great Tribulation.  Are we seeing the precursors of that system now? How close can we get to the world before we become complicit in its opposition to God?

Jesus said that we are to, “Occupy ‘til I come.”  (Luke 19:13 KJV)*  In context, the  idea  is that we are to be about our Master’s business until He returns.  Foremost, our Master’s business is to:

Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.  Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” (Matthew  28:19-20 NLT)*

For now, we are called to live here and to evangelize.  We are to instruct the brethren in how to become disciples of Jesus Christ.

What about our citizenship?  As Jesus told Pilate:

My Kingdom is not an earthly kingdom. If it were, my followers would fight to keep me from being handed over to the Jewish leaders. But my Kingdom is not of this world. (John 18:36 NLT)*

 Jesus will establish His kingdom here on earth after the Second Coming. (Revelation 19 and 20)  Until then, Christians have a sort of dual citizenship.  An example is given to us in the life of Paul.  Assuredly, the Apostle Paul was a citizen of the Kingdom of Christ.  However, he was also a Roman citizen.  If publicly claiming the privileges of Roman citizenship was a betrayal of his Lord, Paul would never have done it - but he did publicly claim Roman citizenship.  (Acts 22 and 23).

To be clear, our first duty is to our Lord Jesus Christ (Acts 5:29), but to the extent possible, we must also obey the government. (1Peter 2:13)  American followers of Jesus Christ are US citizens.  We owe allegiance to the United States of America, and we are subject to its laws.  Section 501(c)(3) is the law.  If churches choose to apply for tax-exempt status, they must obey the law.  If ministries choose not to apply for tax-exempt status, they also must obey all applicable laws.  Remember that our Lord told us, “… give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar, and give to God what belongs to God.” (Matthew 22:21 NLT)*

Now here is the problem.  Section 501(c)(3) prohibits ministries with tax-exempt status from involving themselves in political campaign activities and supporting or opposing legislation.  It restricts pastors, church leaders, contributors, and others from realizing “excess” economic benefit from ministry activities.  There are many other rules, and a church may lose its tax-exempt status for intentional or unintentional violations.   Like most tax law, 501(c)(3) is convoluted and difficult to understand.  The IRS has a publication to “help” people comply.  It is 13 pages long!  Ministries with tax-exempt status are intimidated into compliance by the threat that the IRS will take their tax-exempt status away.  In short, the government can regulate what is said in tax-exempt churches, and to an extent the IRS regulations govern how such churches are administered.

The First Amendment to the US Constitution says in part that, “Congress shall make no law respecting the establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, or abridging the freedom of speech …” (emphasis added)  The courts have ruled that 501(c)(3) does not violate these First Amendment rights, (Branch Ministries vs. Rossotti, 12 May 2000).  My mind is overwhelmed with acerbic observations.  Nevertheless, case law is law until it is overturned.

To make matters worse, there seems to be a disparity in how the law is applied.  Christian ministries seem to be regulated in a heavy-handed way, while the religious bodies of other faiths are not.  As an example, some Mosques are known for “radicalizing” potential terrorists.  Yet, nothing seems to have been done to stop them.

Churches, other Christian ministries, and those that support them need to ask themselves what their first love really is.  Is it advancing the cause of Christ, or is it money?

One of the worries church organizations have is that contributors may stop giving if the ministry loses its tax-exempt status, and their donations can no longer be claimed as a tax deduction.  Contributors, are you giving to the Lord’s work because you love Him, or is it because you can claim the gift as a tax deduction?  It is not wrong to take any legal tax deduction, but Jesus sees into our hearts.  He knows our motivations, and cares about our reasons for giving.  If the primary reason for your giving is to get a tax deduction, rather than serving Jesus, you have your reward and can expect nothing further from our Father in Heaven. (Matthew 6:1-3)  Our Lord taught us that, “You cannot serve God and be enslaved to money.” (Matthew 6:24 NLT)*

Jesus said:

“You are the salt of the earth. But what good is salt if it has lost its flavor? Can you make it salty again? It will be thrown out and trampled underfoot as worthless.

“You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden.  No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house.  In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father. (Matthew 5:13-16 NLT)*

Can we be salt and light in a derelict world when the government can tell us what we can (or can’t) say in our own churches; or outside them?  Will we obey when government tells us not to talk about which candidate’s goals and policies match God’s Word most closely?  Is your Pastor able to preach freely in support of laws that will make the United States a Godlier nation?

I have served on the board of a small church.  I am aware of how difficult it is for ministries to make ends meet.  Yet, it is best policy, in my opinion, for Christian organizations to refrain from applying for tax-exempt status, and to withdraw themselves from it if they are currently tax-exempt.  We must have faith.  God will provide.  Jesus said:

… your heavenly Father already knows all your needs.  Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. (Matthew 6:32-33 NLT)*

 

*  https://biblehub.com/

Father's Day 2021

Those of us who have been able to live with our fathers, at least for a while, have had different experiences with them.  Unfortunately, some of us may not have good memories about “dear old Dad.”  Many of us, however, had good fathers who loved us; who were honorable men we could look up to.

Dads are human.  Most of us do the best we can.  That is why the Word of God says:

“Honor your father and mother”
- which is the first commandment with a promise –
“so that it may go well with you
and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”
(Ephesians 6:2-3 NIV)[1]

It is good for us to remember that we do well if we are able to live up to the example set by our fathers:

My daddy lived his life with two kids and a wife
And you've got to do what you've got to do
But he showed me enough of what it takes to see you through[2]

A father’s love is expressed differently than that of a mother.  It is, however, no less deeply felt.  I always am touched when I hear the song “Daddy’s Hands.”  Thanks Dad, for devoting everything you had to trying to give your kids a better life than your own.  You got it done.

Daddy's hands were soft and kind when I was cryin'
Daddy's hands were hard as steel when I'd done wrong
Daddy's hands weren't always gentle but I've come to understand
There was always love in daddy's hands[3]

---

[1] https://biblehub.com/niv/ephesians/6.htm

 [2] https://genius.com/Donny-hathaway-put-your-hand-in-the-hand-lyrics.  Written by Gene MacLellan

 [3] Source: LyricFind Songwriters: Holly Suzette Dunn Daddy's Hands lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

 

Biden versus Putin

On June 16, 2021, U.S. President Biden and Russian President Putin plan to meet in Geneva, Switzerland.  Jeff Zeleny, Chandelis Duster and Betsy Klein of CNN.com report that the White House has stated that the two men plan to discuss “the full range of pressing issues.” *

We can only hope that President Biden will make a better showing with the Russians than his people did with the Chinese in Anchorage, Alaska (March 19, 2021).  That meeting was reminiscent of 1938 in Munich when Adolf Hitler bullied Neville Chamberlain into giving him the Sudetenland prior to the beginning of World War II.  There is little evidence to show that Mr. Biden will do any better.

As much as we may wish that he would retire peacefully to a villa near the Black Sea, Vladimir Putin is an able leader and an experienced judge of the mettle of other men.  The Biden Administration’s weak performance in Anchorage cannot have escaped him.  It is reasonable to think that, prior to the meeting, President Putin will take Joe Biden’s measure and find him wanting.  President Biden is all bark and no bite.

These men have two things in common: they are both political survivors and they are both corrupt.  The most likely outcome is that Putin will dominate Biden and get what he wants.  Then, the Biden spin doctors will call it a great victory for our side.

What does Putin want?  He wants the United States and its NATO allies to get out of the way, so Russia can pursue its goals.

Historically, the Russians have wanted warm water ports.  They have wanted a buffer zone of client states on their Western border to defend against invasions from the West.  Russia has worked to develop a world class economy on a par with other world powers. Even today, however, their economy is flawed.  Without economic improvement, they cannot sustain the kind of military power they needed to be a superpower.

Russia has always survived financially by exporting raw materials and importing finished goods.  Currently, their economy is heavily dependent on exporting petroleum products. 

During the Soviet era, they tried to export communism to less developed countries to build a geopolitical sphere of influence.  Now, they are trying to build an economic network of client states to grow as an economic power.  Hence their ambitions in Eastern Europe, the Baltic States, the Middle East, and South America.

Russia has sought to expand her influence in the Middle East giving her the ability to expand or contract the world’s oil supply.  It would increase her economic, political, and military clout.  For the same reason, the Russians, (through their proxy, Cuba), are attempting to make a vassal of Venezuela, which has vast reserves of oil, precious metals, and minerals.  It is also a nice place to put missiles and airbases from which they could strike the United States with very little warning.    

The draconian methods the Soviet Union used to control the nations of Eastern Europe following World War II left a legacy of bitterness.  The strong economies and high standard of living in the European Union and the United States made it attractive for the nations of Eastern Europe to align themselves with the West after the Soviet Union collapsed.  Under Putin, Russia tried to strong-arm Eastern Europe into aligning with herself.  Unfortunately, he has not learned that threats, intimidation, and force drive people away from you.  (Note that Russia has moved large numbers of troops to its Western border prior to the meeting in Geneva.)  Military aggression in Georgia and the Ukraine, and a coerced plebiscite in Crimea, have caused the Baltic states and Eastern European countries to look to NATO for protection.

In the West, memories of the Cold War have made people loathe to see Russia become a resurrected Soviet Union.  To some, Russia under Putin has become the Soviet Union all over again.  After the fall of the Soviet Union, the United States and others provided economic aid to Russia in the hope that they would become a thriving democracy.  The absence of a democratic tradition has made it possible for an undemocratic oligarchy to gain and hold power.  The United States and other NATO countries have tried without much success to restrain the more aggressive of Russia’s actions.  

The current situation is a recipe for disaster.  NATO has no stomach for a fight, and President Putin knows it.  However, there is a delicate balance between what Putin can bully his way into, and what will create a situation from which the NATO countries cannot back down.  What we hope President Putin will discern is that Joe Biden has no clue about how to find that balance.  Biden may not even know that it exists.  Pray that each of these two flawed men will somehow avoid putting the other in a position from which there is no reasonable way to extricate themselves.

 

*  https://www.cnn.com/2021/05/25/politics/biden-putin-summit-geneva/index.html

 

Memorial Day 2021

Memorial Day is a holiday when Americans remember our war dead.  Hopefully, we can set aside our differences long enough to take a moment to think about their sacrifice and be grateful.  Their families, loved ones, and friends should be remembered, also.  We are grateful for their sacrifice as well.

On November 19, 1863, Abraham Lincoln delivered the following speech at the dedication of the Gettysburg National Cemetery:

Gettysburg Address

Fourscore and seven years ago our fathers brought forth, on this continent, a new nation, conceived in liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived, and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battlefield of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting-place for those who here gave their lives, that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this. But, in a larger sense, we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate—we cannot hallow—this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us—that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they here gave the last full measure of devotion—that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom, and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.[1] 

Gettysburg was just one of many bloody Civil War battles; brother against brother, father against son, friend against friend, and Americans against each other.

Today, once again, Americans are divided against one another.  Some have speculated that we are as divided as we were at the time of the Civil War.  A lot has been written and said about who is to blame.  I will not speculate about that here.

Reasonable people ask: Who in their right mind wants things to go that far?  Does anyone want to see more of our people die?

Maybe we all should take a deep breath and try to resolve our differences. George Santayana is credited to have originated the famous quote, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it."[2]

While we remember those who “gave the last full measure of devotion,” let us honor them by rededicating ourselves to being, “…one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.” (emphasis added)

---

[1]   https://rmc.library.cornell.edu/gettysburg/good_cause/transcript.htm

[2]   https://bigthink.com/the-proverbial-skeptic/those-who-do-not-learn-history-doomed-to-repeat-it-really

 

 

Marriage

We have all heard the old saw, “Be careful what you wish for, because you might get it.”  Nowhere else in human experience is that more pertinent than when it is applied to marriage.  Don’t get me wrong, I am all for marriage.  The Bible says:

The man who finds a wife finds a treasure,
and he receives favor from the LORD. (Proverbs 18:22 NLT) *

It is wise, however, for both men and women to use caution and to seek the Lord’s leading when they marry.  A friend once told me, “When marriage is good there ain’t nothing better, but when it goes bad it’s the pits.”

Traditionally, most cultures have regarded marriage as a life-long commitment.  An attorney friend once cautioned me that marriage was the only legal contract one makes for a lifetime.

Too many marriages end in divorce.  Sadly, the divorce rate among Christians is nearly the same as it is among other couples.  Historically, ending a marriage has sometimes been treated as a taboo in many societies, but at other times it has also been allowed in a cavalier fashion.  In my observation, divorce causes a lot of wreckage in the affected peoples’ lives.  A person very dear to me once told me, “With some mistakes, you just have to pay and pay and pay.”

The Bible provides only two conditions in which Christians may divorce.  It is permitted (but not mandatory) when one of the partners commits adultery (Matthew 19:9), or when an unbelieving spouse deserts a Christian (1Corinthians 7:15).  Jesus wants us to be forgiving.  Nevertheless, we are not asked to remain in a marriage where the offending spouse refuses to accept responsibility and change their behavior.  Further, men and women who are being subjected to physical abuse need to separate from the abusive spouse.  The Bible teaches that we have the right to self-defense.

What I am saying is not intended to be judgmental, nor is it intended to be antimarriage.  It is cautionary because we (myself included) enter into modern marriage with far too little caution.  Too few of us turn to God for guidance regarding marriage, divorce, or anything else.

The Word of God urges married couples to have an attitude of servanthood, one to the other.  If we do what God says things turn out better.  The Apostle Paul used the relationship between Christ and the church as an example for us in marriage:

And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord.  For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church.  As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.

For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word.  He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault.  In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.  No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church.  And we are members of his body.

As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” (Genesis 2:24) This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one.  So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:21-33 NLT, emphasis added) *

Men and women, please allow me to share a truth that I have learned from experience.  If you do not know the meaning of humility before you get married, you will learn it after.  If you do not learn to be humble, there is a good chance that your marriage will fail … or become a life-long contest for control.  A stanza from a popular song said, “It’s my belief pride is the chief cause of the decline in the numbers of husbands and wives.” **

The Book of First Peter is often misunderstood and misapplied.  One of its themes is humility, and it urges us to be humble in all things:

… Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters.  Be tender hearted, and keep a humble attitude.  Don’t repay evil for evil. Don’t retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God has called you to do, and he will grant you his blessing. (1Peter 3:8-9 NLT, emphasis added) *

And all of you, dress yourselves in humility as you relate to one another, for

  “God opposes the proud

   but gives grace to the humble.” (Proverbs3:34)

So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor.  Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. (1Peter 5:5-7 NLT) *

 Marriage is no exception:

In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives. (1Peter 3:1-2 NLT) *

In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered. (1Peter 3:7 NLT) *

Now, before you object about submission and humility, it helps to remember that God is God, and we are not.  I am not saying this in my own authority.  It is God’s wisdom for a happy life.  Consider our Lord’s example:

You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.

Though he was God,he did not think of equality with God

as something to cling to.

Instead, he gave up his divine privileges;

he took the humble position of a slave

and was born as a human being.

When he appeared in human form,

he humbled himself in obedience to God

and died a criminal’s death on a cross. (Philippians 2:5-8 NLT)

When God unites a Christian married couple, they become one, and that united person must be  dedicated to serving Christ.  If you turn your marriage over to Jesus, and try to honor Him in it, it will go better for you.  My wife and I have found that it helps if we read two chapters in the Bible and pray together (almost) every day.  It opens our hearts to what Jesus has for us in our life together.

I confess that I seem to need to learn the lesson of humility over and over.  I am stubborn, proud, opinionated, and more than a little domineering.  Praise God for his patience with me (and my wife's patience, too).  I give all the credit to the Lord for our long-lasting marriage. When we tried to do it ourselves, we always messed it up.

 

*  https://biblehub.com

** “Husbands and Wives” (1966) Written by: Roger Miller Lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind https://www.lyrics.com/lyric/2042776/Brooks+%26+Dunn/Husbands+and+Wives